Thursday, May 5, 2011

Last Scene

 
The last scene is one long goodbye
on the street under the light.
He stares into her eyes with such
longing and love, she seems aloof
and looks around as he talks.  She
finally looks him in the eyes as soon
as the blade pierces her skin, no one
exists but him, that moment, that blade.


17 comments:

Ann said...

Not our typical Judy work. Excellent! Scary! Startling!

Lynne said...

Oh my, Judy! This gives me the shivers!

Peggy said...

Quite a surprising twist in this. A final scene indeed!

Mary said...

I like it when you experiment with different styles, Judy. An intense poem! I especially like the ending:

"that moment, that blade."

Willow said...

Stunning surprise ending, I expect her to end it, but he ends it with a knife! Powerful.

The Poet said...

What a twist at the end...totally unexpected.
Brilliantly captured.

Laurie Kolp said...

Stunning, sharp piece Judy.

Kerry O'Connor said...

Wow! That was a surprise ending... an interesting piece of prose poetry.

Marian said...

judy! what everyone else said!
whoosh!

Sherry Blue Sky said...

I was really surprised by the ending. Startling and highly effective twist.

madhumakhi said...

OMG! This is scary! Is this person with the blade an angry boyfriend?

Eileen T O'Neill ..... said...

Judy,
A very powerful scene set with your words and then that very unexpected ending!

Next chapter, please......

Eileen

Henry Clemmons said...

Reads great out loud. Way to stick you're message home at the end. It was flowing along smoothly and then WHAM. Very nice. Great skill.

Anonymous said...

incredible.

Jingle said...

keep shining like a famous star.
you rock.

Victoria said...

Dramatic.

Jack Edwards Poetry said...

Brilliant twist into darkness at the end. Great work.