Tuesday, January 13, 2009

My Prayer

Thanks for noticing I haven't posted a poem in a while, Mary. I'm glad you watch. This prayer isn't mine originally. The first two lines come from Byron Katie I believe. I like her prayer and the rest is mine. Its a timely prayer for me as I go into the new year because it's kind of a goal of mine as well.

Spare Me

God spare me from the desire
For love, approval, and appreciation.

These life necessities have become my
Albatross, even as I kick one after another

Into a place they belong. They always
Rear their heads again and cause me pain.

I have so much love in my life, I no longer
Want to beg or try to find a way to

Sway someone into liking or loving me.
The freedom I feel just saying the words

I give this up takes such a load off me.
My desire for approval is overwhelming

When faced with people who disapprove
And there will always be those who do.

I am weakened by my desire to sway them
I think less of myself if I allow that.

The big one, God spare me from seeking
Appreciation. Lift that from my shoulders

Let my expectations wane and find other
Avenues to find my appreciation, those paths inside

Myself. My hard work, dedication, gifts, will
Have to be given with a release from expectation.

I’m always shocked, hurt when people aren’t
Appreciative, but they find difficult what I find necessary.

To live a better life, I’ll seek to rid myself of desires
Not met. I’ll love, be approving, and show my appreciation.

Satisfaction with what is grants me peace. Living
My life with grace and thankfulness is an answer.

Judy Roney

7 comments:

Peggy said...

A prayer for all of us Judy, not to let our self-interest get in the way of living life well. You certainly embody to me someone who gives freely of yourself without regard to what you will get.

Victoria said...

Good reminder, your prayer, of the dangers of attachment. Good for e to remember too.

Darrell said...

Judy: What you're talking about in this poem seems to be a family trait. I know that all my brothers and sisters and I have over time discussed this weakness, or "flaw". In fact, Mom also struggled with the same thing. I remember talking to her about it more than once, and we both agreed that it came from a lack we felt with our fathers. And so we spend the rest of our lives looking for those emotional needs to be fulfilled by others--friends, family, coworkers, bosses, pastors. Unless of course, we recognize this in ourselves, and fight against it, as you are. Here's to growth! Love, Darrell

Mary said...

I do understand what you are saying in this poem, Judy.

I think it is a fine line in regard to wanting love, approval and appreciation. I do think these are things that all people want.

After looking through this poem (again) a few times I am struck by the words in the first verse

"God spare me from the desire
for love, approval and appreciation"

and the words in the second last verse...

"I'll love, be appreciating, show my appreciation."

So to me it looks like you will seek to GIVE what you think it is not good to want yourself.

This is a bit of an enigma to me in this poem and I am wondering about this.

Judy said...

I just mean that since I desire those things, I think others do also, Mary. What I can give them is perhaps what they can't themselves give to me or to others. I know it's important and I choose to give what I know is important. I can't expect everyone to feel the same way or if they do to be able to give it.
I guess I am saying we have to accept people for what they are able to do. We can't change them, only us. If I can change the way I feel about receiving those things that I consistently don't get, then it makes MY life better.

Mary said...

< I guess I am saying we have to accept people for what they are able to do. We can't change them, only us. If I can change the way I feel about receiving those things that I consistently don't get, then it makes MY life better.
>

Thanks, Judy....that helps! I get it now.

Glenda said...

Judy,I've learned that most people want and need validation, approval and appreciation. Employees work harder for appreciation than for money.
I yearned for approval from my father, my family and others. Now I realize they wanted my approval.

I give recognition, appreciation to others and it comes back to me. I find more satisfaction in myself.

This poem has that universal theme. We all need love, approval and appreciation and by giving those things to others we gain them for ourselves.
Great poem.